Sex Cults

Do you ever fantasize about running a sex cult?

I used to think EVERYBODY wanted to be the things I’d imagine being:

  • CIA Agent
  • Art thief
  • Drug dealer
  • Homeless tent village operator

It doesn’t take many anecdotal surveys to realize most people have no interest in any of those things.

2020 has taught us many things. But one of the more powerful teaching moments of 2020 has been how shockingly different most of us are. It turns out we all have crazy aspects of our lives that most other people would find totally surprising.

  • White supremacists
  • Anti-fascists
  • Outlandish racists
  • Hardcore protestors

Khaki pants wearing accountant by day, torch carrying KKK member by night.

But who of us doesn’t have some wicked skeleton in our closet? We express outrage at one person’s grotesque nature while behind the scenes we’re covering up our own perverted fetishes.

So, yeah. I like to play out how I’d run a sex cult.

And honestly, can’t you see me as a sex cult “guru”?

I’d grow out my hair that is bald on top but would be grey and wispy and scraggly around the edges. I’d let my grey beard grow and grow and grow. I’d start wearing white robes like Gandhi.

I’d start saying stupid crap like: “The way is not the way. It is the way.” (I believe I have a knack for saying meaningless bullshit that people think is some sort of high level wisdom.)

While I’m a little in awe of how these sex cult guys know exactly how to pick out the most vulnerable “disciples,” I’m sure there must be some how-to books on how to get your own personal sex cult off the ground. I think I could grow a pretty average, middling sex cult in no time.

If you are a “fan” of sex cults, like me, I highly recommend “Wild Wild Country” on Netflix. That guy was a sex cult master.

Sex cults are on my mind today because Keith Raniere, founder of the sex cult Nxivm (pronounced Nex ee Um), has been sentenced to 120 years in prison. I don’t need to tell you the entire brutal, disgusting story. Plenty of other people have done it in graphic detail.

He was a multi-level marketer that just took the MLM model to the next level by getting women to seduce other women into his nightmare of an organization.

Every time I think about starting my own sex cult the evolution of thought goes something like this:

  1. I should start a sex cult.
  2. But my sex cult won’t focus on sex.
  3. In fact, I will make it a point to not be like all these other sex-cult-guru-losers. No one EVER would say or do anything that humiliates or demeans anyone. We would be all about self-empowerment and self-gratitude.
  4. Rule #1 would be: no one in authority EVER has sex (or does or says anything even remotely suggestive) with anyone in the group.
  5. My non-sex sex cult will be all about lifting people up, making them feel good about themselves.
  6. And when they start feeling good about themselves then we can work on helping them feel good about all the other people of the world.
  7. Yeah. I don’t want to start a sex cult.

The thing is, my non-sex sex cult is probably a dream for many people. Maybe for more people than people running actual sex cults. They just don’t make national news like actual sex cults. They aren’t salacious and scandalous. They are just nice places to be.

I have a big problem with run-of-the-mill sex cults. Yes, the lifetime damage done by these predators is horrendous. But that’s not what bothers me the most. What bothers me the most is what such selfish, small thinkers these sex cult operators are. All they care about is being worshipped and sexed. It’s just so basic.

Is that all you want out of your cult guru life? Being worshipped? It’s embarrassing how myopic and little these people think. Wouldn’t attempting to lift up as many people as possible be a true accomplishment? Isn’t that a much greater audacious vision for a “guru” to have?

These guys just prey on the weak and needy to make them into slaves. (Literally, Keith Raniere called his followers slaves.) I just can’t get over what cockroaches these losers are. Their cruelty is only surpassed by their shallow vision.

There is a point for me writing this.

The monsters of the world come dressed as priests, officials and teachers.

I want people I know, particularly young people, to be aware that there are some incredibly selfish people in the world. And they often put themselves in positions of authority. They build trust. They exude knowledge and experience. But they are ultimately building a web to trap unsuspecting people that are looking for the very thing these people are promising.

Most people have the natural tendency to trust what people in authority say. We have been bred (by authority) to trust authority. These predators use that power to their advantage.

While I can’t guess at the percentage of good leaders versus evil leaders, my guess is that good leaders FAR outnumber evil leaders. But a few evil leaders can do massive damage.

I don’t need to tell you the horrific stories of priests, teachers, police, coaches and relatives using their authority to attack people in unspeakable ways.

My message is always the same… whether I’m talking about people interacting with homeless people or PhD professors: Don’t be afraid. Just be smart.

  • Trust your instincts.
  • Bring a friend.
  • Know your boundaries ahead of time.
  • Never let someone convince you to do something you don’t want to do.
  • Be clear about your boundaries. It’s hard to say what you want. But you need to say it. (It actually gets easier the more you do it.)
  • Don’t be afraid. Just be smart.

I will never blame the victim for being entrapped by a predator. But predators exist in all walks of life. They are selfish and will hurt anyone to get what they want.

It’s hard to believe a person wearing that police uniform, that doctor’s scrubs, that pastor’s robe could possibly be out to do terrible things to you, but it sometimes happens. And, I’m sorry to say, it could happen to you.

Don’t be afraid. Just be smart.